…You see the life I’ve got means I hardly sleep a jot.
I started university at the end of September, and it’s full on already, man. I mean, right now I’m just taking a break from listening to some additional lecture material about standard deviation and z-scores, and later on I’ll be trying to approximately balance the evidence for and against the Aquatic Ape Hypothesis in time for a presentation.
Anyway what with this and that, I really haven’t been keeping up with my sleep research.
But on Saturday, hungover after dinner at a friend’s house,* my subconscious woke me up with a dream that K had just dumped me – by text, the cad. It wasn’t even spellingly or grammatically correct, which is all the more heartbreaking.
This morning, a dream about masturbation. No really, there was a Downton Abbey – style house in which lived a lot of aristocratic women who had never learnt how to masturbate. Two of the servant-girls slyly told them what they were missing. The aristocrats were too overcome with new-found delight to know that the servants were laughing behind their aprons at how pathetic their naive mistresses were.
Also, sitting at my computer studying, and being distracted by a large, dark grey owl that seemed to swoop directly towards my bedroom window, then change tack at the last moment to fly over the house instead.
* there were deep-fried olives, and homemade lamb ravioli! Juskers I’m a student don’t mean I have to eat pot noodles, yo.
Another bird-of-prey dream. Rumbling along on a train, I noticed something huge and red-brown in a tree. It was enormous – bigger surely than any English bird of prey, and more vibrantly coloured. As my angle of looking at it changed, one creature separated into two – a mother and chick, perhaps, but getting a last look at their furry, orange backs, I wasn’t at all sure that they were birds and not orangutans.
(When I told them this dream, one of my housemates helpfully played a bit of Jim Morrison’s Bird of Prey on his phone, so I’ve intermittently had that stuck in my head for the rest of the day.)
And, a hypothetical lover (no-one I actually know) asking me whether, aside from the annoyance of folks frequently patronising me, there were also some advantages for me in people thinking I’m much younger than I am. I shall mull that over.
1. I had a little kitten, mostly black with some white. It was playing in the garden when I noticed there was a huge, fierce-faced buzzard perching just feet away. * “Shit,” I thought, “do buzzards eat cats? Or is it cats that eat buzzards?” I brought the kitten in, just to be safe.
* I did see some buzzards the other day, whilst driving (or being driven, rather) down a country road. They were perching in low trees, close enough that I could see their faces and know they meant business. Come to think of it, K and I were talking about dreams at the time, and I interjected to say that buzzards in the trees represented not giving a fuck.
There was also a tiny muntjac deer, grazing by the side of the road. When I told one of my housemates, she claimed sincerely that she’d dreamt of a muntjac deer the night before!
2. My therapist was seriously – maybe terminally – ill, and I was looking after his cat.